Let The Games Begin

So there's nothing novel here, just four good friends looking to slash a couple points off their respective BMIs in preparation for a nice summer wedding in The Berkshires.  This competition will run for just under 4 weeks.

Here are the simple rules of engagement:
(1) The competition shall run from June 13 - July 8 2011.
(2) All competitors must lose 10lbs during the specified interval to be deemed "winners."  The competitor who achieves the greatest weight loss (as determined by percentage of weight lost) will be treated to a dinner at the restaurant of their choice. 
(3) All competitors who fail to lose 10lbs during the specified interval will be deemed "losers."  Losers must compete in an intense agility challenge that involves suicide sprints and beer chugging.  This is a proprietary event that is patent pending; the details of which are therefore not appropriate for further disclosure.

A brief introduction to the competitors:

Albano: Born to eat.  At age 8 he could polish off a two-person zuppa de pesce and still have room to pack away a loaf of bread, bananas foster, and 4 breath mints.  In high school he wore a sign in the lunchroom that read "garbage disposal" and routinely ate the equivalent of five lunches.  His greatest work came in college when he theoretically consumed a Tony's chicken parm sub and baked ziti with meatballs in one sitting.  Some claim this defining moment never occurred.

Oestreicher: Has more body hair than a young chimpanzee which effectively shields most adipose stores, but requires weight loss for "summer suit" purchase.  Since recent weight gain, Oestreicher has been prone to frequent sports-related injury.  A self-proclaimed master of squash, Oestreicher recently lost big to Albano in a one-sided mismatch that left him bruised and battered in a Boston ER.  His excuse: "I'm fat."

Allen: A poster child of gluttony and self-indulgence, Allen views dieting as a direct obstacle to the pleasures of life.  Allen's gastrointestinal tract appears never-ending, similar in some respects to the Great Wall of China.  In this competition he reigns king in terms of daily calories consumed, daily calories consumed from alcohol, and daily calories consumed from fat.  At a recent BBQ festival in manhattan, Allen plowed away 14 ribs and 3 pulled pork sandwiches only to later be chagrin that he didn't have enough time to wait in line for fried pie.

Pollak: Has suffered a lifetime of abuse and criticism for being overweight, mostly at the hands of an unnamed Indian acquaintance.  Tired of being called "Rob the Blob," he has undergone a recent full body transformation and now runs marathons and trains on a regular basis.  Further weight reductions may prove difficult for this chiseled foe, but if anyone in this competition can do it, Pollak certainly can.